Morning but what was happening? Where were the children and their somnolent post-sunrise protests as my wife prepared them for the halls of Oak Elementary? Had I not become accustomed to pulling the covers and drowning in a half-conscious lullaby of clinking dishes and discouraged intimidation over missed bus rides and future discipline? Why was my wife not rushing through the house with a barbaric urgency, complaining about perceived tardiness, issuing me a list of endeavors to ruin my saintly frolic with the morning? Come to think of it, why was I still in bed? Why had the previously dependable alarm clock not kept its half of our agreement? Who can you trust to rescue you from the dark hours if not your lifetime-warranty appliances? Read More